Your Real Enemy

“Revenge is sweet”, someone said. I am not sure. A few sterling figures might agree with me: Jesus of Nazareth, Gautama Buddha, Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi and maybe Uncle Remus.

Please ignore the “uncle” part, because that is just residual racism. We are talking about stories attributed to a black story-telling freedman in the latter years of the 19th Century. The stories featured various animals, most often “Brer Rabbit” and his enemy, “Brer Fox”.

In one story, Brer Rabbit is walking along the road one day when he sees a stranger sitting on a stump. Brer Rabbit considered himself a friendly, sociable type, so he greeted the stranger with a “Howdy do!” But the stranger did not respond. This bothered the rabbit. He went back to try and explain to the stranger that he was supposed to greet him back.

The rabbit’s actions raise some control issues. We really can’t control what someone is going to do. Even if we could, we probably shouldn’t. This is easy to say and hard to do. We want other people to respond to us. We expect a return for doing good. That is what Brer Rabbit wanted. So he gave the stranger another chance. He explained that he was going to do the whole thing over again, but if the stranger did not respond, he was going to hit him on the head.

He did this and got nothing. So he hit the stranger on the head. To his surprise, his hand was stuck. This was because the stranger was a dummy called a “tar baby” that had been created by the rabbit’s real enemy, Brer Fox. He had done this to fool and trap the rabbit. It worked. One of the reasons it worked was the fact that Brer Rabbit’s brain was about the size of a walnut. The other reason it worked is that violence presents itself as an easy solution.

Non-violence requires a higher level of consciousness. Gautama Buddha stated: “One is not called noble who harms living beings. By not harming living beings one is called noble.” Martin Luther King Jr. said: “In spite of temporary victories, violence never brings permanent peace.” Mahatma Gandhi pointed out: “An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind.” “Love your enemies”, Jesus of Nazareth said. “Pray for those who mistreat you. Bless those who curse you. If someone hits you on the jaw, offer them the other side of your face. If someone takes your coat, give them your shirt as well. Don’t repay violence with violence.”

I ask you, what fun is that? We all know that this non-violence stuff is just bunk and won’t work. That is also what Barer Rabbit thought. He was angry because his hand was stuck. He told the dummy made of tar to let go and threatened violence. You can guess what happened next. Before long, the rabbit was stuck to the tar baby by all fours and his head. That is when his real enemy, Brer Fox made his appearance.

At this point, the rabbit is more involved with the tar baby than he ever wanted to be. This should give us second thoughts about revenge and trying to control others. Revenge just tells someone that has done you wrong that they succeeded. It is just another way of staying stuck to the tar baby and continuing the relationship when you should be moving on. In Greek, the word for forgiveness means “to send away” to “make a part”. Yes, forgiveness can lead to reconciliation, but it also implies creating some distance! When you expect a return from someone it makes you the slave of someone else’s response. You are stuck in the tar.

The wisdom of non-violence is not only meant to free us, but also those persons who do violence, who hate, who steal, who control, who abuse. Because sometimes those people are us and there is a deeper, darker enemy from which we must all break free.